Thursday, February 11, 2010


About me. I don’t do too much these days, what with my injuries and lack of a car, so I predominantly spend my leisure time reading nonfiction books about astronomy until the muscle relaxers lull me into insatiable drowsiness and I can’t possibly keep my eyes open any longer.  Then I fall into my most bizzaro non-waking life. (Did you catch my Tweet yesterday about my recent dream involving feeding cats maggots from rotten vaginas? – yeah, my unconscious is revolting.)

Speaking of revolting, the water in my office building was out for about six hours today. I josh you not, the hallways were scented with the not so lovely odor of el urine de human  (as folks continued using the facilities, they just weren’t flushing the toilets – or, washing their hands, evidently). In response, I simply ceased to eat or drink anything following the fateful shut-off.

I have a zero tolerance policy regarding filthy bathrooms. Case in point, when I was dating The Jovial Jew, he used to drag me to hippy music festivals in the middle of East Jesus where unwashed flower children camped for the duration of the gathering. The only facilities available were the nearby rivers (which I can’t vacate in on general principal) and the Porta-Potties. I would TRY to use them, but the second I entered the narrow stall and looked down at that shallow bluish, chemically treated “water” and considered what might be floating therein, my urethra said NO WAY. The prospect of noxious splashback was too terrible to confront. Instead of food and drink, I existed on weed and mushrooms for several days straight. Hoping to gain some sustenance from the hallucinations or something…

To go back to vaginas (healthy, not rotten ones) I’ve put up a new header to my bloggity blog. Anyone notice the description below? --

“see through the nipples and speak from the vulva”

This phrase refers to something I learned in Estes’ book regarding wild femininity. To “see through the nipples” is to trust your basic instincts and to “speak from the vulva” is to communicate only the highest, most fundamental of truths. Words to live by, I think…

I will leave you, dear readers, with a factoid. Were you aware that it is not just sea levels that are affected by the interplay b/t the Earth’s rotation and our moon’s gravity? The very earth below our feet rises and falls in tides of approximately twelve inches every 6.5 hours or so. Also, our bodies are pulled by this tidal force, but not noticeably so (something like .000000000000004 of a centimeter for a tall person).  Is fascinating, no?